Stressed out? Probably. It is a reality that most of us face, especially since the “pandemic”. Whether you have too many things to do and not enough time to do them, or don’t take good care of yourself, or you are navigating a difficult relationship at home or at work, the source of stress is different for each of us. Some people say financial concerns cause stress. Others say their stress comes from a family situation. However, for so many adults, their job is the primary cause of stress.
Though stressors are different, the effects of stress are what we might have in common. Stress, sometimes called the silent killer, has been blamed for all kinds of chronic conditions: high blood pressure, depression, reduced immunity, insomnia, and anxiety, just to name a few.
Luckily, there is something you can do to help you navigate stressful moments, and to build up your resilience.
You CAN give your nervous system a break from this emergency we call life and enjoy a few simple moments throughout your day. The following practices of mindfulness can help you to create calmness, access more creativity, and be more resilient. You can use them at home or at work.
- Start Your Day with an Intention: When you get up, or when you arrive at work, decide what you want to experience more of or what you‘d like to focus on. Set an intention for the day. You’ll always find what you are looking for, so it’s important to be more intentional with your attention. Here’s a Suggestion: Identify what your want to see more of in your life. Maybe you want to cultivate more kindness, or be more efficient, or gain more inspiration, be more creative, or find more focus. Whatever you choose, write it on a post-it and stick it on your monitor to remind you of it.
- Be Here Now: Your life is taking place right now. This moment, like all present moments, is when you have access to creativity, inspiration, possibilities, your inner wisdom, your emotions, and connection to others. Though it can be a mental habit to worry about the future or ruminate about something that happened, you can free yourself from that. One way to is to anchor your attention in the present moment by paying attention to each one of your senses. Try it now. Listen to the sounds in your environment. Notice what you are feeling physically. Notice the light and colors around you. Notice any aromas. Notice if there is a taste in your mouth. By bringing your attention to your senses, your focus can shift back to the present moment just enough to relieve stress and get you back on track.
- Reconnect with Your Body. Get in the habit of asking yourself, How do I feel right now? Tune in to the sensations of your body and breath (without judgment). You can do it now. Give yourself three long, slow, deep breaths. Next, relax your body, whether sitting or standing. Feel your feet on the floor. Notice your weight and balance; relax your arms and hands. Straighten your spine. Lower your shoulders. Soften your face, your eyes, your jaw, your forehead. By bringing your mindful attention to your body, you can slow down the reactivity center of the brain and allows you to get relief from stress. Pay attention to your body and breath for a few minutes at least three times a day.
- Make Ordinary Actions Mindful: Are you mindful, or mindless? Do you feel present and engaged? Or do you tend to be frazzled, reactive, or uninspired? Mindfulness is when you are completely engaged in what you are doing while you are doing it while refraining from judgment. It can reduce stress, increase your self-awareness, and expand your situational awareness so you can make better choices moment by moment. When you practice being mindful you can be freed from habitual responses such as being distracted, rushing around, and operating on “autopilot.” Here’s how: Choose a simple cue to remind you to take a mindful moment. It could be when your phone rings, or when you first get into your car, or when you begin a meeting, or when you fill your water bottle. Use the cue to remind yourself to S.T.O.P. S for Stop, T for taking a mindful breath, O for observing what is really going on (what you hear, see, feel), and P is to proceed with more awareness, less, stress, and a present moment engagement.
- Mindful Refreshment: You can practice being present with a regular daily activity such as eating a meal or drinking a beverage. Here’s an example: It begins when you pick up the bottle or glass. Notice the way the light reflects on it. Notice how the container feels in your hand, its weight, texture, temperature. Next, take a slow sip and swallow. Notice the temperature and flavor (if there is one). Become aware of the sensations on your lips, in your mouth, and down your throat, as you drink and swallow. Don’t judge or label your experience, simply engage in it. These mindful moments will refreshment will help you to savor your life.
- Ring in the moment: Do you grab the phone as soon as it rings or pings? Are you trained to drop what you are doing to find out who the heck wants your attention. You can change your stressful reactivity pattern. You are not Pavlov’s dog, instead, you have a choice. Here’s how: When you hear the ring, you can pick up the phone, let it go to voice mail, or let it ring one extra time so you can take a deep breath. The ring or ping can also be a reminder to change your state. For instance, you can shift your gaze from your computer screen to something else for a moment – such as the view outside the window, or a photo of your loved one. Or, it can remind you to take a moment to relax. It can also be a cue to reflect on your intention for the day.
- Slow it Down: Practice monotasking. Do one thing at a time. And even take your time doing it! These practices give your brain a break from the stress. Here’s how: Every once in awhile practice performing an ordinary task more slowly whether you are driving, walking, reading, eating, talking, listening, or drinking. You might find at first slowing down drives you a bit crazy, especially if your habit is to rush through your tasks. But when you find yourself in a hurry, ask yourself, What is all the rush about? You might find you’re simply in a bad habit: you are being mindless when you could be mindful. Slow down to savor this life of yours.
- Approach People, Places & Experiences with a Beginner’s Mind. Don’t be a know-it-all. Instead, be present with what is actually happening instead of your ideas about it. Maintain a childlike curiosity. For example: Go for a walk (without talking on your cell phone) and resist the urge to label or categorize anything. Notice the actual colors, textures, shapes, temperature, sounds, aromas, space, light, shadows, movement and stillness as each sweetly meets your senses. Simply experience, rather than label, this world around you. This works not only on a walk, but when you meet someone, whether you know them or not. With an open mind, wisdom, inspiration, and support are found everywhere.
- Use Your Inner Compass: When faced with a choice, pay attention to how you feel, notice the sensations in your body. Do you have a gut feeling? Go with it. Is your whole body saying now, but you ignore it? Don’t. Do you want to say something but you have all kinds of reasons why you don’t? Say it. Express yourself and live with integrity. (Speak your truth with kindness.) There is no need to manipulate yourself to please someone else. Here’s one way to do it: When faced with a choice, ask yourself, “Is it a yes or a no, (or a yum or a yuck)?” Move toward the yums and away from the yucks. Stay in your integrity, trust yourself, and relinquish your need for approval from others. You are the wise one. You usually do know best.
- Take a Time out for a Time In: Get your power back and “re-source” your energy. Practice mindfulness meditation. Here’s how: Sit down comfortably, close your eyes, relax your body, and as you gently breathe through your nose, focus on the natural sensations of your breath as it moves in and out. Don’t try to clear your mind, don’t worry if you have a load of thoughts. However, when you notice you are distracted, refocus your attention on the breath again, as often as you need to. This refocusing is what trains your attention. Be kind to yourself while you do it. Welcome everything, and let go of expectations. Don’t wait for something magical to happen, instead, just do it. When the time is up, return to activity slowly. Even if you don’t think anything happened, it has. You’ll have released stress, relaxed your body, and you’ll be more energized. It’s suggested to sit in meditation for 20 minutes each day. You can do it all at one time, or in two periods of 10 minutes each. This is one of the best stress relievers (along with getting plenty of sleep and being outside in nature.